Pre-match build up
I wasn’t planning to watch the game today, but after both of my mates pulled out of going to watch a non league game I was left with no choice but to enjoy some Goldbridge ball. If the game this year was anywhere near as good as the 8-7 last year we are in for a treat. YouTube all stars look slightly weaker with key players Noah Beck and Harry Pinero both missing, especially HP who was crucial at the back last year so that makes Sidemen FC the slight favourites going into the game.
Ksi in goal is very interesting as he is looking to protect himself for his upcoming fight vs Tommy Fury so a lot of eyes will be on his performance. The commentary is in good hands with a great balance of professionalism with Spencer and comedy with Stephen Tries.
Production level up
The production levels this year have gone up to another level, Ref Cam and KSI cam are both welcomed additions. The big flag in the middle gives the game the feeling of a cup final. The car to bring the ball on the pitch is a snazzy addition but its condition was somewhat in doubt after Will NE brutally 2 footed it. Drone cam was also very cool as well as the fire when the players were coming out. Most of this was a catalyst of the huge upgrade in stadium with the game being enjoyed by 60,000 fans at West Ham’s Olympic stadium. The largest charity match to date.
Rapid intensity
As expected, the start of the game was frantic and chaotic as everyone was buzzing to be on the pitch. Straight from kick off Theo Baker drove through the sidemen defence and wrapped a shot just wide of the post. Two crunching slide tackles from Tobi and even more crunching from Speed set the scene. Tackles were flying in from the off.
First tester for KSI
Filly who was in complete control of the midfield and game at the start tested KSI very early in the game from a free kick. KSI’s positioning was questionable but he sprung across his goal to unorthodoxly flap the ball behind for a corner for what made a very decent save. Niko totally bodying Lazerbeam was also a very funny moment at the start of the game.
American’s offside rule failure
The Americans are yet to understand the offside rule with Kai Cenat having his Speed moment with a cracking finish despite being yards offside, which Goldbridge shamelessly celebrated. Speed was offside basically the whole half but in fairness seemed to pick it up at half time. Karl was also spotted miles offside!
Bez’s fairy-tale moment 1-0
After 9 mins, the breakthrough finally came through as Bez drove towards the goal with only the unit Jidion stopping him. Jid forgot he was playing football and bent down to punch the ball straight into Bez who took it on the stride and drove straight through on goal. It was a clinical low driven strike into the far corner as Bez finally got his first goal in a charity match and his dream goal at his beloved West Ham’s stadium so it was very emotional moment for him. Bez was very solid the whole game providing an engine in the midfield for Sidemen and his fitness levels were a class above.
Chris MD Banger 1-1
Shortly after in the 15th min, a moment of Chris MD inspiration resulted in a quick fire equaliser. Chris absolutely skinned both Calfreezy and Harry to rifle a hard shot into the far bottom corner. Nothing Ksi could do. Another top quality solo goal from Chris MD in a charity match which is becoming a common theme.
Pace of the game/ Steven’s class commentary
After the first 15 mins inevitably the pace of the game slowed. The boiling heat was taking its toll on a lot of the players and a much needed water break restored the level of intensity.
Steven was on fire in the commentary box, consistently laying into poor old Chris MD who as I’m sure Steven made you aware is very single. His best line was ‘Here’s JME, he spent last season at Brentford. Oh wait that’s not Mee.’
Mr Sidemen Charity Match gets his goal 2-1
A lovely goal from back to front in a flash. The move started with KSI into Ginge who played a lovely progressive pass into Manny who sprayed a world-class ball straight into Simon whose touch was on the money to set him up for a clinically-taken, low-driven power shot to get his inevitable goal and he celebrated it with the Rashford celebration.
Deflected strike 2-2
A nice cut back from Filly into his best mate Chunkz whose curling effort was destined for the top corner but took a nasty nick off Harry’s back to send KSI scrambling across his goal, unable to prevent it from going straight down the throat of the goal. Valuable goal that left the game all-square at the break. Both goals at the 45 min mark.
Half time thoughts
Firstly best wishes to Theo Baker who was stretchered off with a hip injury – really hope it wasn’t as bad as it looked because he’s suffered far too many bad injuries. Allstars were the better team creating more and better chances with 13 shots to sidemen’s five. Sidemen were clinical with their two chances. Stand out for both teams was Ethan for Sidemen who was everywhere and had some engine on him and Chunkz whose feet for a big man are magical, whose cardio has come on leaps and bounds and who created 9 chances throughout the game. Game was there for the taking for either team.
Quick fire Manny double 3-2/4-2
Manny started the second half how he started the first half – showing his class. He wasn’t involved in the game that much but everytime he was, he showed his class. He opened his account for the day with a quick burst of pace to burn his defender and played a lovely one-two with Simon. It was a decent strike but looking at the replay first question marks on xQc who the powerful shot went straight through.
Shortly after, Manny got his second goal and if his first wasn’t xQc’s fault, his second certainly was. Simon Sombrero flicked the ball off Jid’s head leaving him clueless and let off a tame strike on target straight at xQc who fumbled, allowing Manny to calmly slot home the rebound. Both goals within 2 mins of each other to make it 4-2 Sidemen.
Speed’s big bottle
Some nice feet from Chris MD resulted in Harry chopping him down in the box for a pen and was arguably the biggest moment of the match. Speed came on to take the pen. Speed vs Ksi: who would come out on top? Speed came up with the driest pen I’ve seen in my life, dead on in the middle of the goal for Ksi to just punch the ball away.
Fosh beauty 4-3
From the corner following on from the pen, the ball broke on the edge of the box to Max Fosh who came up with a cultured left-footed curler into the bottom of the goal leaving KSI with no chance in the 56th min. A strong contender for goal of the day and certainly celebration of the day with an elite knee slide. Top work!
Mad minute 5-3
KSI was mucking around with the ball in the edge of his area and Chunkz dispossessed him (looked like a foul) and, with KSI on the floor, set up Speed on a plate who again with a lack of conviction tamely hit the ball into Calfreezy who came up with a huge block on the line, which was the highlight of his solid afternoon.
Straight up the other end, Manny showed his class again to set up a pass but he overhit it straight into xQc who strangely decided against picking the ball up who dribbled into Jidion which set up Tobi who impressively played 58 mins with an injury for an easy tap in to make it 6-3 and a nice griddy for the celebration.
Speed chances
A couple more Speed chances of note – firstly he used his lightening speed to drive through, question marks over if the finish was going in or not. Either way the shot was smartly saved by KSI for another corner.
His final chance was KSI again mucking around with the ball and Speed came flying in with a brutal slide tackle which hit the post – at this point you just knew it wasn’t going to be his day.
Manny hat-trick 6-3
A rapid counter attack with a 3 on 1 overload from Sidemen. Tobi laid the ball off to Manny who wanted to pass the ball to Vik who has sadly made his run too early. Manny just cut inside and again another classy little finish wrapping the ball into the bottom corner. A decent effort from xQc to make what would have been a tough save and Manny deservingly got his hat-trick.
Worst piece of goalkeeping I have seen 6-4
The less said about this KSI own goal the better. Not sure if he did this on purpose but either way he had a howler. Chunkz with a tame effort straight into KSI who gathered the ball on the second attempt but then for some reason rolled back into his goal taking the ball into the back of the net. That will be memed all over the internet!
Best save of the game
Shortly after, KSI somewhat redeemed himself with a fantastic save, preventing Chris MD’s shot from going into the top corner of the net. Some would say that was the perfect height for him but for his likely first cameo in goal in an 11 a side game, that was a very impressive save.
Harry’s magic moment 7-4
As well as Bez’s goal, my favourite moment of the game was finally seeing Harry finally score in a charity game and what a belter it was. Goal of the game for me. Vik with some top hold up play set up Harry who slapped the ball into the top of the net to finally get his first goal and another incredible moment all around.
Niko strikes 7-5
Speed set Niko through and serious question have to be asked of KSI who should have come and claimed the ball but instead stayed glued to his line. Costly mistake to do when a lethal six yard box finisher like Niko was around who easily slotted the ball into the far corner to give the all-stars a much needed lifeline.
Saudi takeover 8-5
More mess at the back from the all-stars – this time Chunkz and Will NE were guilty which put the ball on a plate for Tariq and, despite Chunkz best attempts to pull him back, he poked the ball into the net which was a nice moment for him to finally end the game.
In conclusion
Youtube Allstars will be very disappointed to lose by that much. Theo’s injury was a massive loss and the lack of a defence and xQc’s disaster class didn’t help. However, they had more than enough chances to score and were very wasteful – Speed in particular. Sidemen were more clinical and more solid at the back which was the difference maker.
Sidemen MOTM: Manny
Only one man who can win this and that’s the hat-trick hero Manny who oozed class throughout. Firstly, with his best play of the game, the through ball assist to Simon and his 3 well taken finishes. You can clearly tell he is a class above the Youtuber level and I think I am correct in saying this was his first match back in a while so to play that well was very impressive.
Youtube All Stars MOTM: Chunkz
Filly started off well but quickly tailed off and Chris had a great second half and a top solo goal and made a strong case to win this but I am going to go for Chunkz who was so impressive today from start to finish. For a big lad, his footwork is mesmerising and his close ball control and everything was going through him and Chris in the second half. He also showed a lot of fight and the best cardio levels. When he lost the ball he would run back and try to get it and he was pushing himself to his limit. 9 chances created is a ridiculous stat as well.
Newcomer MOTM: Ginge
Wasn’t sure what to expect from Ginge outfield as I have only ever seen him in goal where he is also very good, but the late addition was a Rolls Royce of a CB. Multiple crunching tackles. One tackle on Speed particularly stood out. Progressive passes to Manny on the second goal and more. You could tell how much it meant for him to be there and the passion and fight he showed. Really impressive. Special mention to Max Fosh who was also solid.
